“The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.”
Leaving club cloud nine because it’s last call and I need to get some rest; it feels good to be done with school and to have something accomplished or under my belt. The big commencement was on Friday and it surpassed my expectations only leaving me feeling exhausted from all the possibilities now in front of me. All the words of encouragement have filled my head and I just need to sleep on all of this. As much as we love to celebrate the party does end you something new must begin. The door closes but another one opens type of deal. I just hope I’m not forgetting anything to do before I close this door.
I guess even though some things end and you have to deal with this closure, there is still this feeling of beginning or renewal. I’m finished with school but now I’m entering the real world and I still feel like a student. The world is my school and the semester is already starting, with all this new confidence I’m holding, things are more vivid than ever. But I now see that there is something to lose in the grand scheme of things and if I don’t take advantage of the time I have in life now, I might miss out on doing things I wanted to do before it’s too late. Make the best moments in these transitions because they will haunt you forever.
Graduation week was highly anticipated but when it was actually occurring it felt like I was just walking in unending hallways never actually taking the time to smell the roses. I had all these things planned for when I completed school that I just forgot about. Not enough time for everything I had planned out, but maybe they weren’t as important as I thought they would be.
They have this gas station-convenient store just off of campus near by where I would catch the city bus. I always went in to get breakfast in the mornings and buy a cold drink after a long day. I also would go in to buy gum or to break a twenty so I could have the correct amount of change for the bus. It was a place I stopped at least once or twice a week. On the counter of the register there was this glass case of cigars. Every time I would go in there I would see these cigars and I always thought to myself. When I’m done with everything I am going to come in this store and buy one of these cigars. Have a cigar for my achievement.
Never got around to buying that celebratory cigar for myself. I wanted to celebrate with that a cigar I had my eye on all semester but things just don’t always work out the way you think they are. I was just happy to be finished.
I wasn’t nervous about graduation itself, I was more worried about making it to graduation on time. So many people for the big event and I just wanted to be sure that I’m following through on my end of the deal. Being on time and even better to be early so you can scope out the venue and see what is on the table. Did not want to show up late for my own graduation; wanted to just walk into it on-time. Like gravy.
Although time is a very greasy thing and it can slip through your fingers very easily if your not paying attention to how you use it. I was staying in Tucson the night of the graduation and it was near the time I was planning to leave the hotel to the stadium. I get a phone call from one of my old friends, telling me he’s waiting for me down stairs. He’s got a gift for me.
I know I needed to be across town but this is my friend “Jay.” We go back since middle school, and after all these years we still talk. Not on an everyday basis but I know I got his support when he’s nowhere in sight. Even though we’re not on the same wavelength, I can still depend on the guy. So I meet him down stairs and we go for a ride. I still have a little time before the big showdown.
Jay and I haven’t sat down and hung out in a long time. It was a peaceful moment away from the chaos of graduation, and seeing someone familiar really reminded me of the beginning. I mean I’ve met so many new people that I haven’t known that long but it’s nice to see a face you recognize after all the years have gone by. We pull up to a park and he opens the glove compartment. He hands me a cigar and says “congratulations.” Of course he has one from himself and we light our cigars and enjoy.
I have all these expectations in life but the things I want may not come the way I thought them. This celebratory smoke session was what I needed. It’s like even though I have to make life-changing decisions on top of the things I’m doing for school, it is good to have people in your life that remind you to have fun and relax. We catch up on current events and trade stories about the world. He drops me back off at the hotel.
That celebratory cigar was the “icing on the cake.” for the entire week.
I had no plans to meet up with Jay and even if I did, it wouldn’t have been the same. So I leave the hotel and start making my way towards the football field. There are several ways to get to campus and I wanted to take my usual route. I go up 22nd like I do normally and there is a long line of cars. All the way to the front of all those cars just parked, is a train frozen.
The train is not moving and I turn around right away, I couldn’t afford to wait. I end up in some neighborhood and get lost for brief seconds. Cops are directing traffic all over and by whatever route I took, takes me downtown. Getting closer to campus I know I will make it on time. Pay attention to the minor details and make adjustments as you go, but never stick to the plan. The recipe is a reference but that doesn’t mean that you need to follow the exact measurements and ingredients listed.
Spice things up and don’t forget to clean up your mess.