I’m re-reading a lot of the earlier posts from last year and it’s very amusing to see because when I was in school, I was so focused on finishing. This is what I was worrying about at the time and looking back I’m noticing how even though you work towards something, you can still be anxious about what is yet to come. For instance once I finished school and I’m no longer worried the same way, but now that I’m looking for employment, my worries seem to be focused around the reality of getting g a job. And I’m going to go out on a limb and say that even when I get a job, my worry will go to something else. It’s not a bad thing I just think the human mind needs a challenge and having goals in sight can be like the motivation to follow through on these plans.
I think my overall drive to finish school was due to taking three years off. Don’t get me wrong I learned so much in my experiences away from school, although when I got back into college, it was like I had to catch up to my old self. I had this feeling like I was behind and I needed to speed up my own progress. Sometimes it seems like things are moving so slow and it just makes me want to rush.
I guess there are these times of exhaustion and impatience, and you just want to be done. It’s important to have goals and ideas for the future but so much of that has to do with the present. Are you fully engaged to the moment right in front of you? Do you appreciate what’s occurring all around you?
This reminds me of this conversation I had with a close friend of mine about living life poetically. Not having everything drawn out or written down, but also not being clueless or out of place in the now. It’s really a balance of both. Being open to what the world has to offer you; and feeling comfortable what you may have to offer to the world as well. You can hinder the present by not being alert or focused about what really matters.
“Walking on eggshells,” is the post food expression. I guess the eggshells can represent or be a metaphor for other individuals’ thoughts and expectations. The judgments and assumptions from anyone besides yourself is really nothing that should stop you, if it’s really something you want to accomplish. Again having your own goals and dreams about the future helps justify anything that needs to be done in the now.
Often times the feeling of walking on eggshells can be due to what you have to offer a scenario. My advice would be to either walk around the eggshell or through them. Tip-toeing or even worse not moving at all because you are worried about what will happen is not the best way to grow.
The worries can motivate you to do something great. The worries can be temporary. The worries of doing nothing at all will haunt me forever.