Already mid October, downhill I am rolling in the universe, there are something’s that I need take care of before the year ends. It’s like a dominio effect, once Halloween begins, then comes Thanksgiving, Christmas is here, New Years too. I’m trying to squeeze out all I can for the year of 2017, this post is me trying to map it out.
I had experienced some bad things in 2007, it was challenging time for me and my family. I just remember having this intense feeling of being greatful, it just so happens to be on Halloween that day appreciation conquered me. Forever thankful for support, always going to remember that love everybody gave to me, I am only what was believed and thought of. I want to share that feeling with someone, before the year ends, I want to show another person how much they mean to the world.
The taste of tradition is bittersweet, we have this American holiday that paints this picture perfect history between people bonding through food. It’s a beautiful story and has transcended into this wonderful tradition in the world, but doesn’t quite fit the main narrative for Indigenous people co-existing on the land now known as America. I was analyzing my thoughts on the holiday, this was around the time our family moved into our new house, our first home. I was willing to celebrate because regardless of the history of the holiday, I know we are going to have a tasty feast by the end of the day. There will be leftovers too, I hope, Grandma is bringing her A game, how can I not partake in this wonderful dinner. Put the politics aside and just enjoy the grub. I want to have a meaningful meal with the ones I love, eat good food, laugh about life. I want to be the host to the best night of the year.
The phones must be charged, the computer has to be on and signed out, there are things to do. Yet, do we turn on the part of the brain that makes you thankful for being alive. I always struggle with gift giving on Christmas, I wait till the last minuet, or not everyone gets a gift, I’m not full filled in a weird way. I want to do better, I know that I am greatful for whatever happens, the ones I care for deserve the best, puttting up with me, they deserve gold everything.
The speed of time is unpredictable, there are things we must be accountable for in life, you only get what you put in. There are things that cannot be seen, and it takes a visionary to create that picture. I may not get to finish everything I needed for the year, but I know If I’m lucky, I can try again next year.